No Commission for You Psycho

Today I was attacked, at Buckle in the mall. I was minding my own business, trying on a hat in front of the mirror when one of the girls who worked there stopped in her tracks to tell me that it looked cute. She asked me if it fit, and I said yes. She then told me she knew of the cutest earrings that would go so well with the hat. As she ran to get them, I glanced at Danielle, asking her to save me somehow but I knew there was nothing she could do. The idiot girl came back with the earrings. I told her they were cute and tried to get away but she told me there were also some in black and ran to get those. She brought them to me, and I told her they were cute as well. So I stood there awkwardly holding the hat and two pairs of earrings, trying to find a nice way to put it all back and get the freak out of there. She then asked me if I was only looking for hats. I said I was just browsing. Apparently browsing means I am looking for a pair of 200 dollar jeans. She took me to where her favorite new pair was, and I said they were cute, but I don't want jeans. She then pointed across the store to another pair of jeans that she thought I might like. I said those were also cute, but I don't want jeans. You freaking annoying failure that I want to sniper. That's what I should have said. Finally, by some miracle, she told me to let her know if I needed anything, and she walked away. I can't even remember what I did with the hat and the earrings, I just remember getting out as fast as I could. It's a shame because I really wanted the hat. The moral of this long story is, leave me alone when I shop. If I want your help I will ask for it.